Shortcut
by The Caramel Koopa
Summary: When Bowser Junior gives Luigi a piece of advice, the plumber should really know better than to listen to the little brat...  A Oneshot


_I'm really not even sure how I came up with this... I was just about to fall asleep, then the idea hits me, and I just _had_ to write it out. So... yeah._  
><em>I don't own these characters.<em>  
><em>Enjoy!<em>

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><p>'This is just great! I was doing awesome! I was in first place! But... oh, why did I have to listen to that brat?'<p>

Luigi continued to yell at himself in his head, reflecting over the situation he was in. Just before this race in Bowser's Castle, Bowser Junior came up to him with a bit of 'advice'.  
><em>"I know an awesome shortcut that can help you, Green-stache," the small koopa whispered. "Listen to me real careful, okay?"<br>"Wait, why are you helping me?" Luigi was reasonably confused. Why would any kid of Bowser's, much less his little tag-a-long, be helping him?  
>"Look, it's Mario in first and you're in second. There's no way I'm winning this championship..."<br>That much was obvious. Junior was in fact in last place in points. It was impossible for him to catch up.  
>"So... you would rather see me win this whole thing instead of Bro?"<br>"I don't care who beats him, but I don't want to see that big bully win!" Crossing his arms, he started to pout, tapping his foot. "It's just you're clearly the best bet now!"  
>The idea of winning did make Luigi smile. He normally wasn't one for sibling rivalries or anything of the sort, so going up against Mario was a bit odd... But wasn't it time for Luigi to be noticed for a change?<br>"...Okay, Junior. Tell me what you know!"_

If only Luigi had knew then what he knew now. The 'shortcut' he had been given was nothing but a prank! And it caused his chances of winning the championship to fly out the window.  
>Just where had he ended up? In a long, twisted hallway that first led him into a pack of raging piranha plants. After he made it out of that mess, he crashed into a priceless-looking vanity, breaking the legs and causing make-up to fly all over the place. Driving away frantically from that scene, he fell through a whole in the floor, landing into an absurdly large chocolate cake.<p>

It took some time, but he managed to pull his kart out of the thick frosting. He then closed his eyes and drove straight, thinking his situation couldn't get any worse. He should have knew better than to make such assumptions, as he then rammed a punching bag. It was at this point that Luigi gave up on the race. He calmly backed his car up and drove out of whatever room it was he was in. Navigating the hallways of Bowser's Castle, he soon came upon yet another room. He stopped his kart as soon as he entered, noticing that this particular room was much more hazardous than the previous ones combined.

All sorts of scientific equipment was scattered about. He looked at the assortment of glass containers, some on the tables and some broken on the ground.  
>'Just where did Junior send me...?'<br>_BOOM!  
><em>"Wha-what was that? I didn't touch anything this time!"

"Was that Ol' Crazy Four-Eyes?" A voice that Luigi vaguely recognized as one of Bowser's sons, the one with the sunglasses, rose. "I bet he's the one who's been messin' with our stuff! I'm gonna beat him good, just you watch!"

"I should be the one to slap him!" This time it was Bowser's daughter, and Luigi could hear footsteps coming in close and quick. "He ruined my make-up!"

"Hey, you try calming down a bunch of mad piranhas," the one Luigi recalled having a blue mohawk pipped.

"He got into my cake before me!" The chubby one? Probably. "I swear, he's gonna get it! That's my cake! No one touches my cake but me! Do you hear me?"

The green-hatted plumber bit his lip in fear when the quartet of trouble makers entered the room. Sounds like it was _their_ stuff that he had drove into and destroyed. He realized that Junior had probably intended for this to happen. Bowing his head, he prepared himself for them to tackle at him. Instead, they all started calling for someone else.

"Hey Freak!" "You Dweb!" "Iggster!" "Hey Leafy-green! Come out, wherever you are!"

"Yeeeees?" Another of Bowser's sons, the one with the glasses, appeared from behind one of the tables, smiling wide.

"Did you get into my cake? Answer now! And I mean give me the _right_ answer!"

"No, I've been in here all day. Oh, did you hear that explosion? See, I'm working on-"

"We really couldn't care less," the girl interupted.

"But..."

"She's right," the one with the mohawk stated. "Right now we're trying to figure out who's been messing with our stuff."

"Hm, interesting!" The bispectled koopa laughed in the way only a psycho could, causing Luigi to jolt up in shock. "Any leads?"

Luigi watched as the siblings fought among themselves. They didn't even notice him, so he concluded he could tip-toe out of the room and eventually find his way out of this maze. As for his kart? Just leave it. It was in pretty bad shape anyway. Maybe it would be mistaken for something that freaky son of Bowser's was working on.

This little escape plan would have worked perfectly if he had paid a bit more attention to his surrondings. He did manage to avoid all of the glass on the floor, but unluckily tripped over a wire that ran across the floor. When he hit the floor with a loud thud, he instantly felt five pairs of eyes focus on him.

'...Just my luck. Now I'm really done for!'

"Hey, it's... um... Not-Mario!"

"Is that chocolate on his shoes? He's the one who's responsible for all of this! Get him!"

Luigi let out a loud scream as he darted out of the room, the koopalings chasing after him. Of course, he had no sense of direction. He turned quickly when he spotted a small corridor out of the corner of his eyes. This allowed him to get some distance between himself and Bowser's little brats. For a minute, anyway. He blindly ran into yet another obstacle, this time one of the koopalings themselves. The one who was always balancing on a ball.

"Um... hi," the koopa looked down at the plumber as he fell on his behind after running into the large ball. "What are you doing here, Green-stache?"

"Grab him, Tiny! He's a cake nabber! We've gotta get him!"

Luigi screamed again as he scrambled to his feet, running past the koopaling who seemed to have trouble wrapping his brain around what was going on. Reaching the end of the corridor, he found an upward spiraling case of stairs. Running as fast as he could up the flight, he entered yet another room. Not even bothering to observe the papers scattered aross this room, he ran as far back into the room as he could, luckily colliding with nothing more than a wall.

"Hallo?"

'Oh, of course, I'm not getting out of this mess until I see every one of these kids,' he thought as the one with the classical-styled hair appeared, as if from no where.

Tired of this mess, Luigi reached into his pockets for something, _anything_ that could get him out of this prediciment. A fire flower? Perfect! Allowing himself to smile for the first time since Junior pulled this little prank, he closed his eyes and started firing balls away aimlessly. He didn't care if he hit anything, he just needed something that would keep the kids away!

Of course, he did hit something, as he inhaled the familiar scent of paper burning.

'...Don't tell me I just hit something important...' He pleaded to himself.  
>"My... my latest symphony! You worthless Green-stache! You will pay for this!"<br>'Figures.'

...

...

"Oh, looks like he's waking up," a familiar voice stated eagerly. Daisy?

Luigi opened his eyes, his body feeling numb. Blinking a couple times, he found himself lying in a bed. Mario, Daisy, Yoshi, and Toadette were gathered by the side.

"Wha... what happened?" His voice was nearly as weak as his body. "Where am I?"

"In the Mushroom Hospital," Toadette placed a hand on his shoulder. "You got roughed up by those Koopa Kids! But you're going to be A-ok!"

Nodding, he closed his eyes again. He didn't even want to think about how much time had passed. All he wanted now was to rest. He didn't want to see a single one of Bowser's kids for a good, long time!

"Aw, but do I have too?" An irritating voice was heard from outside the door. "I was only playing with him!"

"If you want any cake," this voice was instantly recognizable as Peach's, "then you will go in there and apologize to Luigi."

"But Mama!"

"Then no cake for you."

"...Fine!"

'...Junior. Of course. Can't I even rest without seeing_ any_ of them?'

The door opened quickly as Bowser Junior stomped over to the side of the bed, pushing Luigi's other guests out of his way. Luigi groaned as he opened his eyes for just a moment, to show the little brat that he acknowledged his pressence.

"Look, I lied about the whole shortcut thing. Sorry, okay? Jeez!"  
>Not waiting for any response, the koopa stomped back out of the room, stopping half-way through the doorway. He laughed a tiny bit.<br>"Oh, and Luigi? I'm guessing you don't pay attention to scores... Mario was never in first. Papa was. And he won, of course. I just wanted to give you a hard time!"  
>Leaving the bed-ridden plumber with that cold fact, the koopa slammed the door.<p>

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><p><em>Thanks for reading, and please review to let me know what you think. :3<em>


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